Rodo's Journal

☞ My Yuletide beta (I had to write to a second person, who actually answered) promised me she would be done by Monday or Tuesday, so I am now glancing anxiously at the mail symbol of my browser every few minutes while I wait for the weekly party downstairs to quiet down a bit. I'm really nervous because I still have to look for a Britpicker and won't be in LE for a few days. My mother and I are visiting the relative of a relative of a relative in Göttingen for a few days and I don't think my mother will book a hotel with internet access.

☞ In other news: Chuck ate my brain. I only watched it because I was a bit bored, it stared Adam Baldwin and because I caught an episode on TV a while ago. I love it. Chuck is adorable and Casey is like Jayne only more clever; I like Sarah and Ellie and Morgan and Captain Awesome. Also: Awesome likes to run around half naked. Overall, the show is sweet and funny, even though it hits my embarrassment squick sometimes.

☞ I actually found a decent story on ff.de. Weird things do happen. Half of the stories that I have to look at as an OP are Mary Sue stories or stories with canon characters as Sues, though. No idea why people over there think the fandoms are overrun by slash. Do het fans have a persecution complex? Is everything about 15% slash more than acceptable?

Does it really make me mean and elitist that I think that Sturgeon's Law applies to fanfiction? Even my own? Because it's wrong and insults the average fanfic writer by calling them incompetent (which, btw, I didn't, I was talking about stories, but apparently story = author).

I really, really should stay away from the internet for a while, or at least certain parts of it. It's just making things worse for me at the moment. Because whatever I try, if I'm feeling even remotely positive about it someone else comes and tears it completely apart.

The only problem is: I don't have anything better to do at the moment.

*whiny post is whiny*

☞ Please remind me to never try an old fandom ever again. I just finished the Hornblower TV series and was desperate for fic. Well, I looked and found a number of promising rec lists, an archive and a very long list of stories. The very long list of stories, unfortunately, contained no useful information beyond title and author. The archive had no fics that interested me, but at least it wasn't frozen in 2002 and about the rec lists ... at least half the links were dead. The others led to stories that I had no interest in. It's especially sad because the first link I clicked on seemed to be exactly the kind of story I was looking for. The author seems to have deleted all her fics, of course. I tried ff.net too, but the Sues put an end to that. *sigh* Never again.

☞ PS: Has anybody any idea how the ancient file size label translates to word count?

☞ Why the translation exchange post on ff.de is doomed to fail: People offer to translate from English to German and authors offer stories to be translated from German to English.

☞ I'm officially tired of kink meme fics. Am I the only one? Am I weird? I see everywhere at the moment, and I'm really longing for plotty fic with romance and non-explicit sex scenes. Or no sex scenes at all! I think I overdosed or something.

☞ I really hope ficathon_de will decide for DW. I decided not to post fic on LJ anymore (my stupid principles tend to be very persistent), so I wouldn't participate on LJ and I don't think using both would work.

☞ Rec: Captive Prince by freece. Summary: Damen is the true heir to the throne, but when his half brother seizes power, Damen is captured, stripped of his identity and sent to serve the Prince of a rival nation as a pleasure slave. It doesn't sound like much, but I am very much in love with the story. So I rec in, even though it has been recced a lot already.

Yesterday, someone posted a rant on fanficrants. The ranter's point was that a) the fandom doesn't need fanzines anymore and that b) the prices on them are very unreasonable, especially considering that you can post/read fanfic online for free. This post is the tl;dr version of my not very organized thoughts on the post and the discussion:

I am rather new school when it comes to fandom, but that doesn't mean I don't understand the appeal of zines (even though I don't own a single one). In fact, I wish I had the money to buy them, because zines have some advantages. Fanfic on the internet disappears very fast, compared to non-net standards. Give it five years and many URLs will be invalid, the authors decided the fics were crap, or the fandom suffered from a wave of cease and desist letters. When you buy a zine, you get to choose how long you want to keep it, not the person hosting and/or publishing the stuff.

( Cut for length )

First of all: This is all lian's fault. And the fault of the anonymous person who so generously gifted me with two months of paid time (♥) at DW. This is also a follow-up post to my last post about fandom and language, in a way. It's also my first poll, so please tell me what I could have done better.

Note: For the purpose of this poll, I won't define "fandom" or "(language) fandom". I'll leave that up to you.

( Follow the fake cut to DW )

The topic of this post is one that has been on my mind for years, and this certainly isn’t the first attempt to write it all down. This post is about my very subjective experience in fandom, which, I believe, is not quite normal. I suppose all of you who are multifannish know at least to some degree what I am talking about, because essentially, I am talking about being in two fandoms at once. But while most people experience two fandoms as two different things they’re interested in, for me, it is the same thing, in two languages.

So I suppose this is where I should introduce myself: I am a German and German is my first language. I didn’t really start learning English until I was ten (so I am not really bilingual). I started writing fanfiction when I was seven. I discovered fandom when I started reading the AnimaniA when I was fourteen. I doubt more than a few of you ever touched that magazine, but I loved it. Buying the new issue was more fun than Christmas. I discovered online fandom when I was nineteen, googling Harry Potter and finding Animexx. A few months later, somebody posted the translation of this really great Harry Potter fanfic (or so I thought at the time – it was the Draco Trilogy), and I started reading it in English.

( That was five years ago, and since then, I spent time in English and in German fandom. )

This post is also available on Dreamwidth

Okay, I think I found my topic for today's meta (I'm keeping my schedule, see?): long stories.

Not stories that are long, mind you. Stories that feel long (not necessarily the same thing). A good story should make you forget time. It should suck you into its world until you wish the story would never end. I've read quite a few stories like these, and I love them. But there are other stories too. Stories that promise to be these amazing stories that you wish would never end, and then ... they just don't. They get longer and longer, full of stuff that is totally unnecessary, that deters from the purpose that is just plain boring to read. These are stories that I wish were betaed by those competent people who know when a story might be better off being shorter. I know I told an author once to cut a few scenes. Am I just an exception or do other people really not mind these stories?

Anyway, I will list a few stories that felt too long for me, and why:

( List under the cut )

I'd like to know about your experiences and theories about this as well, because I don't think I'm the only one who hates feeling that reading a story becomes some sort of chore that I only keep doing because I really used to love them. And is there any way to tactfully tell the authors that their beloved hydras really aren't as lovely as they seem to think?

Note: This is probably not very well thought out (I'm running on caffeine). I also apologize if linking these examples hurts the authors. I will take out the links if it does, just leave me a comment.

Ich bin jetzt schon eine ganze Weile auf fanfiktion.de. Seit Herbst 2004, um genau zu sein, also anderthalb Jahre nachdem ich das Fandom über Animexx entdeckt habe. Über lange Zeit war es nicht mein Hauptarchiv, aber seit ich einige meiner Sachen nicht mehr auf Animexx posten konnte und ich es dort generell nicht mehr so gut fand (aber das wäre ein Thema für einen anderen Post), ist ff.de quasi mein Hauptarchiv. ff.net taugt schließlich nicht wirklich als Alternative für Deutschsprachiges und mit anderen Seiten konnte ich mich auch nicht anfreunden. Findet außer mir noch irgendwer, dass myfanfiction.de vom Layout her zu myspacig ist?. Außerdem ist „Depression“ kein Genre, und es ist auch mit Sicherheit nicht das, was sie im Blurb angeben.

Aber nun zum Thema. Die Punkte sind nicht vollkommen durchdacht und wahrscheinlich würde mir noch mehr einfallen, wenn ich etwas länger darüber nachdenken würde:

( 8 Kritikpunkte zu ff.de, ohne besondere Reihenfolge )

Wahrscheinlich bin ich einfach zu verwöhnt durch InsaneJournal, LiveJournal und meine eigene Webseite, bei denen ich (größtenteils) machen kann was ich will und mich nicht mit dämlichen Beschränkungen herumärgern muss. Außerdem zeigt das OTW-Archiv, dass diese Optionen durchaus technisch umzusetzen sind.

English:

Well, needless to say, I haven't been well. I hope I can sort it out some next term. I at least managed to go to a doctor and got a note which allowed me to take a break from university. And I handed in a homework today which I hope will find its way to the lecturer (secretaries at my university always get ill when students have to work on a deadline) and that she will be okay with ten pages plus bibliography instead of ten pages including bibliography. *sigh*

( Fic Progress )

Deutsch:

( Ein neues Rating auf ff.de )

Dear certain someones,

the ability to bear children or a uterus are not the defining criteria for the term "woman". Hence mpreg does not mean that one of the men involved is turned into a woman (especially if he keeps his male genitalia). Sex and gender are slightly more complicated, and not everybody fits into category A or B as neatly as you think.

Well, my last post was rather depressed, so on a lighter more fanish note:

( Cut for spoilers for Supernatural, Dexter and Merlin )

Lately I have been unable to find any new fics I want to read. So I decided to look up all the fics I stored on my computer before I could spend all my time online. They are mostly from 2004 and before, and my archive is in pretty bad shape. I'm trying to make them look presentable, but it takes ages *sigh*.

( It follows a tale of lost fandoms, lost writers and lost history )

Today, I got two anonymous comments on two of my stories (Well, one HP fic and the essay about male pregnancy). They weren't flames, they were just rather critical and not exactly polite. I didn't mind that at all. What I did mind very much was the fact that I had no way to reply to the criticism, and that really bothers me. Generally, I reply to all comments I receive to say thanks, to reply to questions asked and to respond to criticism, and to these two I wanted to respond really bad. I am even thinking about disallowing anonymous commenting on my fics now, to avoid something like this happening in the future.

I assume both comments were written by the same author. One of them, the one I got on my essay, made it clear that the person didn't really read my essay but just wanted a place to rant about mpreg. Not all that unusual, most of the readers react that way to it. This one, however didn't even understand that I didn't intend to write a "What is good mpreg?" essay but rather one about the phenomenon and why people write it. It's more about the authors and readers of mpreg fic and less about the fics themselves.

The second comment criticised the first sex scene I ever wrote. I agree that it's not a good sex scene and that I could have done a lot of things better. However, the commenter focussed on the mechanics of sex, which, as I learnt on fanficrants, is different for everyone. The statement "anal sex without lube hurts like hell" is not true for everyone. I really want to tell this to the person, complete with links and all, but I just can't. That's really frustrating.

I always thought the main problem with anonymous comments were flames, but I think they are much easier to deal with. You can get them deleted, or you can delete them yourself (depending on the site). This is something different. Am I silly for reacting this way?

For those of you who didn't know yet:

The beta version of Fanlore, the OTW's wiki has been launched.

My reaction for now: *points at icon*

• Apparently "Misc. - Book X-overs" is ff.net slang for "Original".


• That I can sympathize with a flamer who flames almost every single fic in that category (at least on the recent pages.


• That Tokio Hotel truly has invaded the English fandom.


• That a story without typos and with good grammar, punctuation and style can still be a horrible badfic.


• That rules are for other people.

Does anybody know a good, multifandom crossover archive? I thought I had one in my bookmarks, but apparently I don't.

Ich hatte mich eigentlich über das neue FF.de-Forum gefreut, aber da die im Moment so einen Wirbel drum machen, dass jemand sich öffentlich über eine gewisse BNF-Autorin beschwert und ihr Verhalten anprangert hat, hat sich das schnell wieder gelegt. Und je mehr ich von den Betreibern mitbekomme, desto weniger mag ich sie. *seufz* Dabei hatte ich die Seite bisher eigentlich recht gern.

Außerdem: Kritik an jemandes Verhalten =/= Verstoß gegen das Persönlichkeitsrecht (inwieweit das auf Internetpseudonyme zutrifft, weiß ich noch nicht einmal)


Wenn das im englischen Fandom genauso lief, würden wahrscheinlich immer noch alle Leute denken, Laura Hale/wie-auch-immer-sie-gerade-heißt wäre die Person für die sie gerne gehalten würde.

Note: This was prompted by the current Supernatural discussion, but it is something I have been thinking about a lot, even before now. It is mainly about my own behaviour online and an attempt at rationalising it. This is also not meant to be a generalisation of fandom interaction in general.

( How the spiral of silence influences my posting habits: )

Last but not least: This is meant to be descriptive. I don't want to get people to change their behaviour, I just want to explain mine. I understand that it is probably difficult to be calm about something if you feel rather passionately about it (even though I am not a very passionate person), and I think that this is very important, because otherwise, nobody would be able to overcome a spiral of silence like the one I am caught up in. So, in a way, I envy anyone who does not feel this way about discussions in fandom.

Okay, so the last two days weren't really much fun, and it does not seem like RL's going to get any better for the time being. In consequence I decided to spend a bit fun-time online and all I found was this. And it got me thinking:

Does the fact that I don't care about one of my favourite characters insulting women make me a bad woman? Because really, I don't. The only thing I really disliked about season 3 is the fact that they had the chance to introduce some wonderful female characters and screwed up. I want Jo and Ellen back.

Some of you may have heard of it, some may not. The Fan History Wiki now uses a bot to integrate ff.net user data into their database. Some people approve, some don't. I don't approve, but not because it collects the information of people who are totally clueless. It's free information after all.

I have a problem with it because it appears that I actually managed to learn a bit during my studies. I study journalism, in case you don't know, and I am not very attentive most of the time, but the concept of News values still stuck somehow. I know a Wiki is not journalism, but AFAIK it's supposed to be an encyclopedia, which should only include information that is in some way relevant to a number of people.

The bot, on the other hand, clutters the Wiki with a lot of information, most of which is irrelevant. An example: Author A wrote five fanfictions, has a profile on ff.net and never participated in any fandom discussion or was in any way involved in a scandal (plagiarism, wanking, etc.). Information on Author A does not become relevant, at least in my opinion, until A is involved in anything that might be of interest to a larger number of people. I know that the Wiki argues that the inclusion of these articles is meant to be preventive (in case A ever gets involved in a newsworthy event) but the chances of this are rather slim, which means the wiki is full of information nobody needs.

This sheer amount of information might also lead to a lot of confusion. For example, I tried to look up my user names, and it came up with a match. I used to be called "Doro-chan" not so long ago, and I suppose people might go looking for me using that name. But the Doro-chan listed there is not me. We've been confused before, because we're both German, both active in the Harry Potter fandom, and of course, because we both had the same name. On some sites, I was Doro-chan, on others, it was her. Consequently, people got confused, because they assumed "Doro-chan" was the same person on all sites. I assume that mine is not the only case of more than one person using the same alias. And if living people confuse us, what about a programmed bot? It does not provide any other information but username and stories, plus links, and I think the information thus collected cannot be trusted. It doesn't even know the German umlauts, for starters.

The Wiki also states that it wants to create "the first comprehensive fandom directory that anyone can edit"^[1], which is an awesome idea. I just don't think it should be part of the wiki. Linked? Sure. But I think the Wiki should not be used as a fandom directory. The two would benefit more if they were seperate.